The environmental problem in the world cannot be solved by ordinary people because what they can do is too little. Instead, solving the problem is the responsibility of politicians.
To what extent do you agree or disagree?
【段落示范】(主体部分第1段)
Although individual effort has limited effect, collective effort can make a massive difference.
第1句话,浓缩一句讲完道理的核心。这句话要尽量短,结构上尽量简单。就用最简单的“主—谓—宾”或“主—系—表”*佳。
For example, if each person could plant a tree, the world would have billions more trees. Having the enormous numbers of trees, our planet would suffer significantly less from warming.
第2、3句话,用举例的方式,用现实解释第1句话里的道理。
If individual consumers would refuse to purchase products manufactured by businesses whose practices are not friendly to the environment, those companies would eithergo out of business or improve their manufacturing and reduce the impact of their production on the environment.
第4句话,还是举例,用另一个例子来增加论证的篇幅和厚度。也是用现实解释第1句话里的道理。
Both cases illustrate what ordinary people can do to solve the environmental problem.
第5句话,给段落形成“闭环”。
【解析】
一、内容维度(TR):*** 特别重要 ***
见行文中批注。
二、文脉逻辑维度(CC):*** 尤其重要 ***
“总—分”结构展开论述。第1句话讲道理,下定论。然后展开讲细节。
三、词汇维度(LR):
四、语法和句型维度(GRA):
第2句中的“could”和“would”值得注意。说明老章在写的时候有含蓄隐晦的虚拟。
第3句中的“Having the enormous numbers of trees”是前置状语,形式是动词的主动分词+宾语。前置状语通常表“条件、原因、方式”。
第4句是个长难句。句子由if引导的条件状语从句+主句构成。其中,if引导的条件状语从句中有先定性定语从句“whose practices are not friendly to the environment”。主句中,either … or … 构成平行结构。另外,老章在这句话中,同样有含蓄隐晦的虚拟。
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